T.B. Pasquale

Posts Tagged ‘horses’

A horse doesn’t care how much you know, until he knows how much you care.  by Pat Parelli

Richaard Zwolinksi, LMHC, CASAC and his wife CR Zowlinksi right a great blog/article repository over at PSYCH CENTRAL, one of the only comprehensive virtual hubs for discussions on issues of mental health.  I was honored when this wonderful team/couple asked me if I would do a question/answer interview with them on horses, trauma, and addiction.  Of course I would!  One of my favorite things to discuss. They are presenting it in a THREE PART SERIES over at Psych Central in their virtual article space called “Therapy Soup”.

You can check out part one at : http://blogs.psychcentral.com/therapy-soup/2010/07/ptsd-addiction-and-healing-with-horses-part-one/

As promised, to round up my adventures in Sonoita, Arizona is an interview I am excited to present with Margaret Burns Vap of the wonderful Cowgirl Yoga Retreats!  Margaret is the founder of Big Sky Yoga Retreat and discovered  yoga about 10 years ago while working and living in the chaos of life in Manhattan, working for L’Oreal. “A few years and several hundred down dogs later,” as she writes on her website biography, Margaret left corporate NYC and followed her yoga passion to DC and created Georgetown Yoga.

Her yogic journey brought her to Bozemon, Montana where she has combined her innate creativity, yoga practice, and the crisp mountainous beauty of her surroundings to build a wonderful retreat program that integrates some of the best mind, body, and spirit wellness and renewal in action (or so I gather as I salivate over the retreats on her website).  She is a mother, wife, yogini, and horseback rider who has integrated her passions in life into her passions in business to create Big Sky Yoga Retreats and Cowgirl Yoga where she integrates yoga and riding for a unique retreat experience–something like organically therapeutic programming.  Nothing like endless Montana skies, horses, and downdogs to make someone slip into bliss. Thank you Margaret for your innovative work and sharing your passion and story with us!

Q 1:   Margaret, what was your inspiration for creating a retreat that combines yoga and horses?

A: It came together rather unexpectedly; when I was working on a business plan for Big Sky Yoga Retreats prior to moving to Montana, my advisor/business partner, who is also an equestrian, repeatedly suggested this idea. I initially shied away from it, given my lack of horse experience. Once I moved out here and began to spend time around horses, it all became clear; these two incredibly powerful experiences garner even more meaning when they are combined.

My philosophy is that yoga helps you do anything better. I’ve seen it happen with myself and my students. When I was first learning to ride seriously, I felt like I was a new yoga student. I remembered how challenging it can be to try something new that you’re not good at; it’s a beautiful but humbling process. I began to recognize all the parallels between being a riding and yoga student, and it inspired me. I knew my yoga practice influenced my riding in a positive way, and I felt the desire to want to share this with others – so Cowgirl Yoga was born.
Q 2:  What is your background in both the yogic and equine worlds?

A:  Riding was a childhood dream, and I shared the love of horses that many young girls have. But like many, I never had the opportunity to be around them much, so the dream faded. Until we moved to Montana a few years ago. I was fortunate to realize this dream as an adult, and embraced all things horses, and learning how to ride and be a cowgirl. When I bought my own horse last summer, I cried; it was a very powerful moment to fulfill this dream.
I’ve always been active and loved exercise, and I vividly remember when I was living in new york city over 10 years ago; I would go to the gym and watch the yoga classes. I was really curious, but it took me awhile to try it. Then once I did, it was true love. I haven’t been without it since, and it’s influenced my life in more ways than I can count. I love that I am able to share the gift of yoga with others through my work; it is immensely rewarding, on both a personal and professional level. Yoga has enabled me to meet many people that I would have never otherwise met; it enhances my health and well-being endlessly; the list goes on and on. And yoga goes well with everything – so now I combine it with riding too.

Q 3: What is a COWGIRL YOGA RETREAT?  What does a day at your retreat look like?

A: Officially, Cowgirl Yoga is Yoga & Horseback Riding Retreats for Women, for all levels of yoginis and equestrians.

From our website copy (which I wrote, and am endlessly refining in order to best capture in words what we do): Imagine a week of yoga and horses – a girl’s dream come true. Explore how both can put you in touch with your potential and teach you a lot about yourself. We’ll practice yoga, spend time with horses, and kick up our heels in cowgirl-friendly Bozeman.

Come join fellow wanna-be cowgirls for yoga and fun in and out of the saddle under Montana’s legendary Big Sky. We’ll explore the link between yoga and riding to improve not only your saddle skills, but also your overall well-being. Through yoga poses and breathing techniques we will learn how to improve balance and body alignment. Best of all, experience how the horse-human connection deepens as you practice yoga. We’ll take all that out on the trail and ride with new friends both human and equine on scenic mountain trails, immersing ourselves in nature and the cowgirl yoga spirit.

Our motto, which I am proud of, is: Add a little Yeehaw to your Namaste. And that is what Cowgirl Yoga is all about. We want you to yell “Yeehaw!” when you have a break-through on the yoga mat, and murmur “Namaste” when you feel that amazing connection between human and horse. So we take those two words out of their typical context a bit.

Each day on a CY retreat is unique, but the themes are recurring: nurturing the horse-human connection, and connecting what we do on the yoga mat to our time with the horses. Every day has deep yoga practices as well as horse time, and each practice feeds the other. On the yoga mat, we spend time not only preparing our bodies for the physical aspects of riding, but also preparing our hearts and minds to be open and receptive to the horse’s energy. We bring back the emotions and sensations from our horse interaction to our mats, for processing in new ways. It’s a cycle with a beautiful rhythm, that encourages unexpected personal discoveries.

As if that isn’t enough, we eat fabulous gourmet local food, savor sipping wine, soak in hot springs, and even get in a hike. Cowgirl Yoga is definitely an active vacation, for mind, body and spirit.
Q 4:  What is your role in the day-to-day running of BIG SKY RETREATS?

A: A little bit of everything! As a business owner, I’m pretty much a one-woman show. As a result there really is no “typical day” – every day can be so different and I love that. In my corporate days, I had a hard time being in an office for a set time each day, it made me stir crazy. But the trade off is that my work life now isn’t predictable, and it’s a big juggling act, especially since my 4 year old daughter is my top priority. So everything I do revolves around her, and I like it that way (so does she).

My work time is essentially divided into 2 categories: on retreat, which is wild and crazy, filled with meeting new people and experiencing their energy, teaching yoga, and fully participating in whatever retreat we are offering while leading it at the same time. Whoa! But it’s like a vacation for me too, because the harder part is the other category: in-between retreats. That is the real work: coming up with new ideas to market my business, improving our offerings, exploring new partnerships with like-minded businesses, writing about what I do for the Cowgirl Yoga blog and other publications, answering emails, taking bookings, offering travel advice, ETC!
Q 5:  What kind of people come to BIG SKY (Cowgirl Yoga) retreats and what are they looking for in your program?

A: We have women come from all over, all different backgrounds and age ranges. It’s incredible for me to see over and over how such a wide variety of women come together for this experience, most of the time not knowing each other, and then interact like they’ve been good friends for years. Last summer we had a famous supermodel attend ranch camp; I have to admit that I was a little bit worried! But she adored it, she spent an additional week in Montana to explore Yellowstone, and she’s coming back this year. There is something about this experience that appeals to almost everyone.

Many people have been fascinated with Montana and its “wild west” history. Many want a big change of pace. And almost everyone has a story about how yoga or horses has inspired them and changed their life in some way, and they want to deepen that.

Cowgirl Yoga is not your typical vacation. It attracts an active person that also wants an emotional/spiritual component to their time away, whether they recognize that themselves or not. Horses and yoga provide potent, meaningful experiences that you can take back and apply to your daily life. It’s not just escapism. It’s taking this experience you have here and infusing it into your life, using it to inspire positive change back home.

Q 6:  What do you see these retreats do for people in the time they spend with you?  Are there changes in how they act, feel, etc.?

A: I feel very privileged that I get to see women enjoying themselves, learning new things, meeting new people. They exude enthusiasm for life, and that is what I wish we could bottle and send home with everyone to open up when needed – talk about the ultimate souvenir! Again, I am so fortunate to get to see people at their best, at the fullest, richest expression of their personalities. It reminds me how complex we all are, and how much we have to offer one another.

What we do is intense. You are being pushed in many ways, physically and mentally. I think everyone here (CY leaders) understands how to not go too far with that, but rather to gently nudge people towards their own breakthroughs. Sometimes the women end up beyond their comfort zones, and there are tears, anger or frustration. But it’s all part of the process, and in the end a very good thing.
Q 7:  Have you discovered anything unexpected in your journey and vision of COWGIRL YOGA?
A: Perhaps the reminder that something that may seem so simple can be so utterly, absolutely complex and different each and every time we do it. Cowgirl Yoga has definitely been a journey, and like all journeys, has had its ups and downs. There are so many different variables: weather (that’s a big factor here in Montana, where we can have all 4 seasons in one day, any day of the year), the blend of personalities and people’s expectations, horse behavior, lots of unanticipated events that can and do affect our intention. But we’ve learned through each unique group and retreat how to adjust things no matter what comes our way, which has increased our confidence in what we’re doing.

Every time you get on your yoga mat, or on a horse, has the potential to produce a wide range of emotions. You can end up elated, disappointed, and lots of places in between. But I believe it’s the huge potential for our own personal growth that keeps us wanting to come back for more. This is my vision behind Cowgirl Yoga.
Q 8: You have begun expanding your retreat programs to include skiing and yoga, hiking and yoga, yoga and chocolate, and yoga for cancer survivors.  Any new programming on the horizon?
A: I’m an idea person, and a marketing person at heart; I love coming up with new things to try. But I have to be a business woman as well – so for now, I think that we’ve explored enough ideas to create Big Sky Yoga Retreats’ core offerings and identity.

I enjoy the process of finding ways to take what we’ve got and deepen those experiences with embellishments and improvements. For example, in past years we’ve done a hike as a separate activity from yoga and riding. This year, we’re going to do a combo hike/trail ride, where half the group rides while the other half hikes, and then we switch at the halfway point.

I do hope that we will be able to offer a mother-daughter Cowgirl Yoga retreat in the near future, since we’ve received numerous requests for one. And seeing my own daughter enjoy yoga and horses makes this near and dear to my heart. It’s important to me to be able to teach from my own experiences – it gives it credibility and sincerity, in my mind.
Q 9:  My work focuses on yoga, horse therapy, and other creative therapies for mental health and wellness.  Have you ever thought about branching out into retreats with specific focus on wellness, empowerment, self-care, emotional healing, or other fringe “mind/body wellness” type programming?
A: I actually feel that those things are natural results of what we offer. People who make the decision to attend one of our retreats are, to me, exercising a wonderful form of self-care – giving themselves this opportunity to take the time out from their lives  for their health and wellness. That decision is empowering in itself. A yoga practice is empowering, and healing. Discovering that you can ride a horse is empowering, and bonding with a horse is healing.

I mentioned before that I have a business background. I guess I’d have to say I steer clear of “fringe” language for fear of limiting my audience…but I don’t think that sort of thing reflects who I am either. I am a very direct person, and I’m known to ‘tell it like it is’, for better or for worse. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in the potential for very powerful things to happen here, because they do. I just prefer to see them evolve organically on their own, from what I know we can offer. I don’t want to promise things that may not happen for everyone.

Q 10:  Do you think the qualities of wellness, centeredness, and grounding can be found in the programming of BIG SKY RETREATS in general?  How are people when they leave your retreats?
A: I had someone email me after a retreat once to tell me that even though we had been “knee-deep in activities” all week, she had never felt more relaxed. There is so much good energy that circulates here, and there is a balance to what we do despite all the activity we are fitting in to a short time. It just reiterates that no matter what you are doing, balance is essential. We are careful to alternate interactive activity with quieter, introspective ones. Just like in yoga: if you do a deep forward bend you counter with a backbend to balance the body. After an exciting ride, you spend some quiet time with your horse to thank him for that time together.

I warn people that they are headed into a whirlwind of activity when they come on retreat. But although they come here for a very active and rewarding experience, they also leave more centered, grounded and balanced.
Q 11:  In the process of your work with your retreats have you come across many like-minded people who believe in these kind of programs?  Yogi(ini)s, Equestrians, and/or people from other professions like mental health, body workers, health care professionals and otherwise?
A: One of the things that has amazed me about our retreat groups is how much common ground there is. These are people who usually come by themselves and all meet for the first time on retreat; often it’s as if they’ve known each other for years. And if they are interested in what we offer on retreat, it’s very likely that they are also interested in other mind/body, health/wellness modalities too. But for the most part, our typical retreater is not a health/wellness professional, or a horsewoman, or even a yogini with an established practice. It’s a person who wants to deepen their mind/body connection, as well as their connection to nature, and may not get the opportunity to do so in their everyday life.
Q 12:  What has been most surprising about this journey of creating BIG SKY RETREATS and COWGIRL YOGA?
A: How much my work has become my life…and I couldn’t be happier about it! Even though BSYR/Cowgirl Yoga has also taken on a healthy life of its own, it’s so interwoven into my lifestyle and what I believe in, and it incorporates many people whom I respect and learn from. I work with companies that offer amazing products and whose missions I support. I get many opportunities to write about what I do, and I adore writing from my own experiences, because what could be more pure than your own true experience? I feel blessed that I can live and breathe this way. It’s always been important to me to do what I love, but I guess it’s never been as true as it is now. Feeling that passion come through every day is something I am unbelievably grateful for.

The other day I had someone call to inquire about attending a retreat. We were chatting, and I asked her how she found out about us. There was a long silence, and then she told me she was crying. She shared how a personal tragedy had spurred her to seek something she desperately needed in her life right now: some healing time for herself. I’d never met or spoken to this person before, but this conversation had the power to move me to tears. It was a reminder of how lucky I am to be doing what I am doing, and making a positive difference in people’s lives (including my own!).
Q 13:  What are you most passionate about in your work and your life?  What drives and propels you forward in this work?
A: I think I answered this in the previous question…

Q 14:  What is your hope for COWGIRL YOGA as it moves forward into the next year? Next five years?
A: I hope that the momentum continues to build and we continue to grow, and that more and more women will come to Montana to become Cowgirl Yoginis. Starting a business is tough; this is my second round (I owned a yoga studio in my previous home, Washington DC, for six years before we moved to Montana). It’s a few years in when things become more rewarding, and you can really start to fine-tune your vision. So right about now is my favorite part of that cycle. I’m really looking forward to it.

Q 15:  Any last words of wisdom you want to leave people with in regards to yoga, horses, or life in general?
A: Keep practicing, keep riding, and let both infuse their life-altering magic into your soul. Nothing else has taught me that life is a journey and we need to enjoy the ride more than yoga and horses. Yeehaw & Namaste.

(ABOVE: ME, ANN, DEBRA & KATHY at XANADU RANCH B&B)

“He who lets the goat be laid on his shoulders is soon after forced to carry the cow.”

Italian Proverb

LIFE IN STRIDE: WALKING, TROTTING, & CANTERING INTO CERTITUDE

My time at the “Riding Your Way Into A Mutual Relationship” workshop brought a flooding of insights, clarities, and a chance to practice advanced mental yoga–really getting my mind into a centered and unshakable rhythm.  Kathy, one of the other workshop participants created the term “Om Trot” to describe a trot that one can really breathe into.  In Nancy’s (my favorite yogini/psychiatrist) urging me to practice Kapalabhati exercises while I was desperately trying to convince my elderly steed Max that a canter might be a good idea she created a spontaneous practice that I will now call the “Kapalabhati Canter”.  It seems to me that there is yoga in every step, every breath, and every motion of riding.  From what our feet say about the emotions contained in our body, to what a reflective round pen session can tell us about how we define our relationships in life, to how we sit on the back of the horse and how we breath into the stride of a trot or a canter can say about what we relay to another breathing being.  All I see when I look at the equine-human experience is yoga in every touch and every hoof beat.

The more I see what is wrong for me in life the more certain I am of what is right; perhaps life experience is a process of elimination getting to what works by way of all the stuff that doesn’t.  My certitude in what I believe persists, even, and especially, in the face of dealing with a lot that I do not want clouding the path to my destination.  We must walk before we run.  We must trot before we canter.  I feel that I am in the early trot of my life.  I know I want to canter, I am certain of what feels right, but for now I am just trying to find my groove in the Om Trot of my life–and trying to enjoy the pace.

BOUNDARY GOATS, GOODBYE.

My feeling, as someone whose bulk experience with horses is in the form of groundwork (as a novice rider and one working primarily with the therapeutic relationship groundwork is so rich for exploring how we feel and act in the world and with horses), is that there are profound levels of self-awareness and relational connectedness that can be explored when one is face-to-face with a horse.  This is true face-to-horse and it is also true, as I found in impromptu case studies, face-to-goat.

As the above quote says, “Those of us who let goats be laid on our shoulders…” and I have, historically, been one to let goats be laid on my shoulders.  Well, not literally, until Sonoita.  I take on all I can take and then I take whatever is left over and although I constantly remind my patients about self-care, setting boundaries, laying down what is ok in our lives in clear lines, when it comes to my life I am constantly being reminded that I need to take the goats off my shoulders and sometimes just say “No”.  And, as animals are great barometers for boundaries I am constantly reminded by the furry counterparts in my life that I need to be firmer when I draw my lines.  My dogs remind me.  Horses remind me.  And even these tempestuous boundary goats in Sonoita reminded me–set the line and be firm or you’ll end up with a goat nuzzling all over your shoulder…and even without horns that can be “ouch”.  So whether metaphoric or literal goats I think we all have to be conscious of when we need to say no in our lives–when we need to take the goat off our shoulders.  And when in Sonoita be careful of goats with a penchant for nuzzling that might just reveal your inner boundary issues.

IF YOU WANT A BIT OF A LAUGH WATCH THIS VIDEO CLIP: A Boundary Goat & A Pup With A Napoleon Complex

ALOHA SONOITA, HELLO CHALLENGES.

I feel as though I could write about 50 posts just on my time in Sonoita, Arizona.  The people, the experiences, the palpable profundities.  But I can’t.  Life and blogs continue at a pace that leave little time for too much for too long and too in-depth.  Which is why, as I knew it would, my Arizona experience which falls on the precipice of another realm of my work, passion, and dream of what can be, will be a lengthier exploration in my book.  I am excited to get working on the equine chapters of my memoir and taking my 21 day challenge of 800 words a day as a provocation to get my literary butt in gear–memoir-wise.  I am glad to have a booklength work to be able to go into the nuances of past, present, and future of this journey of mine far beyond the span of what blogging allows.  That said, I want to give Sonoita and my time there a great blogosphere Aloha–not a goodbye, not a hello but somewhere in the linguistic in-between where, like aloha, this post will be goodbye and hello all in one.  In leaving Arizona I felt myself beginning something new and so Aloha describes it best.

The greatest thing I take away from my time in the desert–above and beyond intellectual and emotional pursuits–is the human connections and dear friendships I believe where born on the mat, in the saddle, and everywhere in-the-twain.  Even at “Steak Out”–restaurant appropriately named for it’s array of meats and one veggie burger (I am going to be honest, all those meats and I nearly had a filet mignon relapse!)–where after 3 days that felt like both too short and also forever we all gathered, workshop leaders and participants alike, to laugh and jabber about passions, writings, and the future of equine facilitated practices.  I feel like I have met a wonderful collective of kindred spirits–with visions of stables dancing in their heads, same as mine, and a few new yogini converts to boot.

I received a wonderfully passionate email from Debra, also a workshop participant (and “Om Trot” Kathy’s girlfriend and proud human-horse “mama” of Sonoki–beautiful and smart young horse with a bright future indeed), in which she gushed excitedly about her passion and the work her and Kathy were doing to make their dreams living and breathing creations.  I was so excited for her and so happy to know another passionate soul following their dream.  At the end of her email she surprised me with some beautiful things she had to say about me, my dreams, and my passion.  Being, personally, in a place where life is overshadowing dreams this past month to hear these words from a friendship forged in 3 days (and an eternity) was moving beyond words–although I can’t help but word-y it up anyway.  I am very appreciative of her email coming just when I needed to hear those things–and wonderful to come as I round out the Sonoita blog post excursion.

And just when I thought the Arizona collective had said its piece for today’s blog piece I got the following blog comment from Shelley, in response to THE 21-5-800 CHALLENGE: ”Ok I’m in for the challenge. Only mine will be five rides, 800 words, 21 days!”

All I had to say in reply was, “It better be full of Om Trots!”

WORD COUNT FOR TODAY’s POST=1286 WORDS (I have posted my quota for today and now I am going to give myself a relaxing Savasana before bed…thank you CHALLENGE for giving me what I need!) Don’t worry I will not be filling my quota daily with posts–tomorrow I am working on a book chapter instead!

“There is a boundary to men’s passions when they act from feelings; but none when they are under the influence of imagination.”

Edmund Burke